While on the subject of quotations, I am always thrilled to find some new claim for a wine on its label. The champagne house of Perrier-Jouet brought out a special bottle in 1989 to celebrate the 200th anniversary of the French revolution. The label actually claimed that one of the main reasons for the occurrence of the revolution was that only the aristocracy were able to drink champagne and so the peasants revolted against this unfairness — happily, as a result of the revolution, the champagne in this particular bottle was now available to all. Rather like claiming that the Ritz Hotel is open to all, this suggestion put my eyebrows into orbit.

   Other labels go on about the natural processes of sun, soil, water and air giving a special blend of fruit and earthiness to this marvellous wine which is carefully chosen by our experts who have unrivalled experience in the field and which will complement any food you care to put next to it. As often as not, the label will get it wrong and say that the wine will ‘compliment’ any food. I have yet to hear a bottle say: “Well done” to a plate of meat. Misprints aside, though, one would think on reading most labels that the wine within the bottle was an entirely natural progression with the only human intervention being, perhaps, the treading of the grapes by nubile young girls in the dewy morn.

   Sadly not. Have you ever been to a modern winery? You will see, of course, wonderful cellars full of barrels and be told at length about the effect of the sun and the earth and how natural the whole process is. You may even see a nubile young girl or two. What you will not be shown is the huge windowless barn behind the original building, which is where the grapes are crushed, the juice is fermented in enormous temperature controlled steel vats and then blended and bottled. Occasional additions to the blend may be required to ‘ex- tend’ the wine — as is reported to be the case in respect of some Bordeaux producers this year, and has been the subject of numerous investigations in the past. The most notorious was in Austria some years ago where the producers were adding antifreeze to the blend in order to juice it up a bit.   So the production may not be quite as natural as they would have us believe but — and it is a big but — quality control is far better (except where the producers try to cheat). Do you really want your wine to have been previously in contact with the feet of an ageing peasant (or even a nubile young girl), and then carried in unsterile buckets to an old barrel, left to ferment and then poured straight into the bottle? Chemicals may allow the producers to cheat but they also guarantee that (where there is no cheating) the wine inside the bottle will not make you ill — unless you drink too much of it, but that is another story.

   After pointing out that wine-making is now an industrial process just like (most) chicken-farming, except that (most) wine does not taste of fish, there is not much room left to recommend wines for June. However, as the evenings lengthen, the sun gets hotter and you sit under a palm tree in your garden, perhaps dipping your toes in the swimming pool, it is time for some decent white. Even if you are not the Governor and therefore without palm trees and a swimming pool, you will enjoy just as much the Kumala Zenith from South Africa (Morrison’s, £6.39). This is Chenin Blanc and Chardonnay grape and as good as a much more expensive Chablis. But then nothing quite compares with a decent Chablis so for a real treat go to Anglo-Hispano or Stagnetto’s and see what they have to offer — there is also an AC Chablis for £7.50 at Morrison’s.

    As for reds, I have been searching in the mid-range level for something worthwhile, but without much success. You cannot, of course, go wrong with a Mouton Cadet claret (Anglo-Hispano at about £6.50) or Jacob’s Creek (from Australia, available everywhere at about £5.00) but I did discover JJ Mc Williams (from South Africa, Cabernet £2.99 at Morrison’s) which is, for the price, really good stuff. Despite the label which talks of wild fruits and such (I was unable to detect any particular wild fruit) this is light enough to go with everything and wonderful value. The moral of this whole column is not to rely on the label, only the taste.