Transient Pleasures     All pleasures are transient. An enjoyable book, a holiday, a comedy programme — even a glass of wine. The length of time the pleasure lasts depends on what you find pleasurable in the first place, and then the cost/benefit ratio. I enjoy sailing, ski-ing and reading, and of course drinking wine, among other things. I have a rather small boat and not a 40-footer, an occasional visit to France or Switzerland in winter and not a chalet at my permanent disposal. However, I do enjoy a sizeable library of books and a decent cellar of wine. The cost/benefit ratio works like that.     To be a premiership footballer requires no little skill and hard work. Whether that skill (and work) is worth upwards of £60,000 a week may be debatable. But with that (to me) unimaginable amount of cash, what do they do with it? Fast cars, fast women and a few fast vodkas. What a waste.    As the Ritz Hotel porter is reputed to have asked, on discovering George Best cavorting with Miss World on a bed covered with £10 notes and bottles of vintage champagne all around: “Where did it all go wrong, George?”    It is not for me to deny such people their supposed pleasures (although I wouldn’t have minded a bit of the champagne) but in terms of cost/benefit I am happier with a bottle of decent claret, a copy of Our Mutual Friend and a few snores emanating from the bedroom.    A bottle of wine lasts no more than an evening and so the cost/ benefit analysis needs to be fairly strict. What are you drinking it for? If a quiet evening at home with a cottage pie before curling up in front of the television then either an ordinary claret (Ginestet from Morrison’s at £3.35 is recommended) or indulge yourself with something rather good (Muga at about £8.00 or a Chateau Belleville from Anglo Hispano at £18.50) — you don’t have to share it with anyone else, especially if the snores are already emanating from the bedroom.    Then there is the small dinner with friends. Here, the company and the conversation are more important than the wine on offer, although the wine should be drinkable and help lubricate the conversation. Start with an Alsace Riesling (between £6.00 and £10.00 at Morrison’s or Anglo-Hispano) — Riesling is neither too sharp for it to get in the way of conversation nor too cloying to stick on the palate. Ideal with your first course of a light pâté, some pasta or just a salad. Then the main course requires a careful choice. Do your friends appreciate wine, or are they just impressed by the label? In the latter case, Morrison’s have all sorts of impressive-looking Chateau thisor- that from about £6.00 upwards. But a new entrant on the market (in Gibraltar) is Marques de Grinon from Dominio de Valdepusa. All these wines are a treat. The knowledgeable people at Anglo- Hispano will tell you all about the revolutionary methods used to produce them, and the fact that the Marques is a real toff. But for £9.00 upwards, although your friends may not recognise the label, they will be stunned by the quality. Mainly Cabernet Sauvignon and Syrah (although there is a good old Tempranillo as well) these compete with and beat any of the Chateau this-or-that, and are a good match for much more expensive clarets. They have kick without being overpowering, an aftertaste that lingers without going sour, and a glorious deep colour. Perfect with your meaty main course and the cheese which follows. Since they are new to the market you may be able to negotiate a discount! But even without a discount they are worth it.    At a dinner party involving a blind tasting recently, one friend insisted that he would not drink any more because it was too good for the likes of him and I should not waste my hard-earned wages. A brilliant method of ensuring he got another glass.    Then there is celebration time. An important birthday, a wedding, an anniversary perhaps. Again, the choice needs making carefully in terms of cost/benefit.    A wedding requires champagne, normally, but will all your guests appreciate that you are giving them a vintage Krug? Most of them will not notice (especially when the bottle is wrapped up in a napkin). So keep the vintage for the favoured few — and make sure that the people serving understand what bottles are for whom.    Other celebrations are perhaps easier. You are pouring large amounts of wine down the throats of people who will — sadly — be more interested in the fact that Paul has reached the grand old age of 40 or that Rosina has had another baby. As long as it is drinkable, the celebrants will not notice how good or bad the wine is, and you will be doing yourself no favours by pointing out its excellence and your generosity in providing it. Back to ordinary claret and a decent Muscadet (or Barbadillo).    The pleasure, while it is still transient, does not depend upon the amount of money spent. It depends on the occasion and your analysis of what pleasure you want. One of the greatest pleasures can be had in sipping a splendid Marques de Grinon while watching a somewhat over-indulgent friend pouring yet another glass of ordinary claret. But be careful not to mix up the bottles.

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